How Covid Stole My Grandmother’s Life Celebration Party

We walked down the palm tree lined street on the warm Florida night, my sister and I, my grandmother and her friend. The laughter was loud and the wine gushed from the overflowing glasses in their hands. They were certainly enjoying their vacation. But again, it was hard to tell when my grandmother was in vacation mode and when she was her normal, boisterous, fun-loving self. That particular night, he saw a Rolls Royce … the car of his dreams. Glass of wine in hand, he jumped on the hood and begged us to take a picture of him. That is a moment in time that I will never forget.

Whether my grandmother was partying with her sisters, hosting large family holiday gatherings, managing her 30+ year old boutique, caring for her orchids, or making sure she was doing her duty as a devout Catholic by having all of us attend mass. every Sunday, she was always the life of the party.

There was never a day that she was not surrounded by my loving grandfather and her husband of 71 years. By all accounts, he lived a good and long life. At 92, his poor health proved too much and he passed away peacefully at home. The fact that she was at home instead of a hospital or nursing home was a blessing to our family. We could call and visit with security protocols until their last hours.

For a woman who would have wanted the party of her “life” (pun intended), her funeral was attended by fewer than 30 of her closest relatives. Cousins ​​and relatives living out of state were asked to stay home for fear of spreading Covid to each other and to my 96-year-old grandfather.

Our small family group attended the funeral, laid her to rest in the cemetery, and gathered at her home for an informal cookout. It felt uncomfortable, not knowing how to act if we couldn’t be our hugs, tell stories out loud, talk close to ourselves. My heart ached from the normality of our pre-pandemic family gatherings.

I know that others have felt the side effects of Covid and its impact on their experiences around death and emotions of grief. In fact, others have suffered much more than our family. Pain is a common thread that runs through society during a pandemic. If the emotion of grief is due to the loss of a job, a loved one, a relationship, a pet, a home, etc. isolation amplifies our dark emotions.

After my family’s experience with the passing of my grandmother, I began to browse the web to see what resources existed for families in situations like ours.